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Is your daughter about to experience her first period? Puberty is a significant milestone, and support can make all the difference. Learn how to approach the topic with kindness and answer all her questions.
First menstruation represents a major shift for a young girl. It can be a mix of curiosity, anxiety, and sometimes pain, making this period somewhat confusing. Here are some tips on how to handle this moment calmly with your child and guide her with compassion.
1. Introduce the topic early and keep it simple
“What exactly are periods?”, “Why do they happen?”, “Does it hurt?”, “What does it look like?”, “Why don’t boys get them?”… These questions deserve straightforward and reassuring answers. From the first signs of puberty, such as hair growth or breast development, take the time to explain what’s happening in her body. Understanding that menstruation is natural and knowing its purpose will help her face this stage with more ease.
2. “The day I got my first period”… Share your story
To help your daughter feel less alone, share your own experiences. Tell her about when you got your first period: where you were, how you felt, and whether or not you were expecting it. Sharing personal stories can also strengthen your bond and make her feel more comfortable expressing her own fears or questions. Encourage her to keep a sanitary pad in her school bag, just in case, so she feels prepared for any situation.
3. Teach her the signs so she can be ready
To better anticipate the onset of her period, go over the signs that might appear with your daughter. These can include lower abdominal pain, back pain, breast soreness, or facial acne a few days prior. These signs, of course, vary from woman to woman and are generally consistent each month. Reassure her that if the periods are painful, symptoms can be alleviated with medication prescribed by a doctor. Depending on the situation and type of pain, don’t hesitate to seek advice from a gynecologist.
4. Pads, tampons, menstrual underwear… Gently explain the basics
At the onset of her first period, sanitary pads are often the simplest option. Take time to show her how to use them, step-by-step, so she feels comfortable. Also talk about tampons, without pressure, explaining that they might be useful later, for example, for swimming. The goal: to build her confidence in navigating this new world. Moreover, there are now menstrual panties available—reusable underwear with built-in absorbent technology. And importantly, suggest she always keeps a pad in her bag just in case!
5. A book for a thorough, independent understanding
Even if you’re there to talk, your teen might appreciate additional resources to answer her questions. A good book on puberty and menstruation can be an invaluable tool. For example, “All About Periods” by Anna Roy (Flammarion editions), “Periods… What an Adventure!” by Élise Thiébaut and Mirion Malle (editions du Remue-ménage). This way, she can learn at her own pace while feeling supported.
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