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“A relationship isn’t sustained by love alone,” reminds our therapist.
Becoming a parent is a transformative experience for a couple. However, it’s crucial to remember that the relationship must continue to thrive even after the children are born. “The ultimate truth is to never forget that the relationship needs to endure beyond the family,” states Virginie Clarenc, a sexologist and couples therapist, right from the start. This simple truth is often overlooked amidst the chaos of daily life.
To ensure the relationship lasts, it is vital to dedicate time to it. “You need to allocate quality time, without screens, without kids, without friends—just the two of you,” advises the expert. These moments reserved for the couple’s intimacy are critical because “we often become solely a family unit and forget about being a couple.” Employment and family duties can consume all your time, and the relationship can quickly fade if not carefully maintained.
“The relationship doesn’t exist just because you love each other,” warns the therapist. Like any relationship, it requires regular nurturing. She likens this attention to the way one might treat their job: “I love my job, so I work at it every day, it’s exactly the same with a relationship.” This means that, to continue being in love and not just co-parents, it’s essential to schedule weekly dates, whether it’s a dinner, a walk, a movie, or any relaxing moment together like a massage or a trip to the pool. “Arranging childcare” is often a necessary step to truly focus on these moments together.
The second key to maintaining romantic closeness is clear and kind communication. “Good communication, good listening, and mutual support are essential,” emphasizes the expert. In addition to spending time together, it’s equally important to have a personal life. “Having a personal life is crucial to remain interesting to each other,” she adds. By flourishing individually, one brings more richness and vitality to the relationship.
In summary, being a parent doesn’t mean giving up your role as a partner. By caring for the relationship, dedicating time regularly, and maintaining effective communication, one can continue to be romantic partners while also being good parents.
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Nora Caldwell brings over a decade of experience in entertainment journalism to the Belles and Gals team. With a background in celebrity interviews and TV critiques, Avery ensures that every story we publish is engaging and accurate. Passionate about pop culture, they lead our editorial team with creativity and precision.
