Is Prince Charming Real or Just a Myth? Find Out Now!

The Everlasting Myth of Prince Charming

The myth of Prince Charming is very much alive: we believe in Prince Charming as we believe in Santa Claus. According to a survey by the International Couples Observatory, 70% of women have once believed in Prince Charming, and 60% of men think they still do, as detailed in Philippe Brenot’s book, One Day My Prince… Finding Love and Making It Last (Les Arènes Publishers). Brenot, a psychiatrist and couples therapist, suggests that our culture has always fed us these narratives—from Disney movies and Hollywood romantic comedies to popular TV shows by Jean-Luc Azoulay like “Hélène and the Boys” and “First Kisses.” Sometimes, we even see Prince Charming in our fathers. These portrayals reinforce our belief in true love. Dangerous? “Not really,” Brenot explains. “It’s important to believe in Prince Charming and romantic tales, keeping the feeling that someone is out there waiting to sweep us off our feet… While we shouldn’t confine ourselves to fairy tales, drawing inspiration from them is perfectly reasonable. The ideal is to balance this idealism with a dose of realism. That’s how we’ll find our prince.”

Life is Not a Fairy Tale

Our sense of realism is ever-present. We are often reminded that the man on a white horse we’ve been waiting for doesn’t exist, and we start to believe it. Plus, we don’t have a fairy godmother, long hair to use as a rope, or a castle to clean. We aren’t Cinderella, we haven’t been asleep for a hundred years (fortunately, when you think about it), and we don’t have seven dwarfs chasing after us to lend a hand. The guys we meet take the subway, sometimes have questionable hair, and fear commitment. When they resemble frogs, a kiss is not enough to change them. “Come back to reality,” we often hear. “Life isn’t a fairy tale, people divorce and are less and less committed.” This slew of negative talk eventually makes us question the existence of Prince Charming. But this is our dose of realism, the part that keeps us grounded. Now that we’ve found a balance—my idealism and realism are present and equally weighted—what do we do to find a prince? Answer: we refine our perspective on these gentlemen because Prince Charming is born in our eyes.

It’s a Subjective View That Creates Prince Charming

The key is to accept that the men we meet are not perfect, but they are absolutely charming. They are princes (our idealistic side) but they have flaws (our realistic side). It’s all about how we view them: if I see this man as a good guy, despite his missteps and the disappointments he brings (that’s life), then he immediately takes on the air of Prince Charming. The idea is to be forgiving, not to blame him for everything, but rather to notice his efforts and his “good guy” side. By reinventing the man in front of us, he transforms into a prince (and we feel like princesses).

The Good News: Men Want to Be Prince Charming

Men are aware that women believe in Prince Charming. They also know that women sometimes adopt an air of independence, needing no one (thanks to the sexual revolution). So, they make efforts, they strive to please us, to be as perfect as possible. Moreover, they are well aware that other Prince Charmings are lurking around us, and that they must compete to keep our attention. Just knowing this should make us firmly believe in Prince Charming, right? So, without further ado, we open our eyes and charge ahead. While we sometimes encounter bad princes, we don’t forget one thing: our Prince is not very far, and if he could ride a horse and join us tonight, we swear he would.

Thanks to Philippe Brenot, psychiatrist and couples therapist, and author of One Day My Prince… Finding Love and Making It Last published by Les Arènes.