Over 40 and In Love? Discover the Célicouple Trend Sweeping Hearts!

A blend of “single” and “couple,” the term “celicouple” has emerged in recent years, offering a new perspective on relationships. “Celicouple appeals to those who have experienced living as a couple, have been married, and have tried the conventional setup. In their second romantic chapter, they often desire something different”, notes love coach Élodie Cavalier. According to the National Institute of Demographic Studies (Ined), this lifestyle has attracted two million French people, particularly those aged 45-65. “They’ve spent 10 to 20 years together, faced all challenges: they’ve done everything as a duo, perhaps becoming more like roommates before separating. In this new phase of singleness, they seek to meet, share, connect, but also to rediscover themselves.” With separation comes a renewed sense of “I want to live for myself,” without letting a relationship take that away again.

What Exactly is a Celicouple?

Being in a relationship but not cohabiting defines the celicouple, a different way to love and maintain a fulfilling relationship. The 45-65 age group is particularly fond of this dual living arrangement, as only 22% are interested in moving in with their partner. In contrast, those aged 26-30 tend to follow a more traditional pattern, with 68% preferring to cohabit. According to Élodie, “this is because they are influenced by the traditional model of building a life together under the same roof, and they don’t see other options, especially if they plan on having children.” However, this arrangement can still work, especially for couples who live in different cities, have varying lifestyles, or different desires. The celicouple can be a transitional phase, living separately before moving in together.

Celicouple: Being a Couple in Separate Homes

It’s common to follow a well-defined path when starting a new relationship. However, some individuals don’t identify with the “classic” vision of a couple. The celicouple then allows them to live differently, “without fitting into a norm where the couple does everything together, is inseparable,” adds the love coach.

“Despite its name, it’s not about being single”

This form of relationship allows them to be a couple each in their own home. “The celicouple is often described as halfway between being single and being in a couple, but that’s incorrect. Despite its name, it’s not about being single; just because you don’t live together doesn’t mean you’re not fully committed to the relationship”, clarifies Élodie Cavalier.

The Benefits of a Celicouple

► No more daily chores. In many heterosexual relationships, women often bear the mental load and manage domestic tasks. By living separately, the daily chores—which can lead to arguments and conflicts—vanish. “There’s no more ‘it’s your turn to take out the trash,’ all the non-glamorous stuff that causes headaches disappears,” confides Elodie.

► Improved communication. “With the celicouple, you can develop a better quality connection since you communicate differently, spending more time together.” Living together, after several years, can sometimes feel like roommates. Partners may no longer really see each other, falling into routine and failing to communicate about their desires and needs. With the celicouple, active listening and presence enable a deeper connection.

► More time for oneself. “We love better: the other person, and ourselves.” By living in separate spaces and spending time away from your romantic partner, it becomes easier to remember your desires, needs, family, or friends. “You can be yourself with yourself, it’s a balanced way of living since you take time to do various things beyond the relationship.” Thus, balance in life doesn’t just come from the couple, but from the various aspects that compose it. “When living together, you can have all this, but with the celicouple, it’s facilitated: you don’t forget about yourself.”

“The habitual daily routines that add nothing to the relationship are no longer part of the equation”

► Quality moments together. “Living separately as a couple means that the moments we spend together are chosen, there’s no obligation, it’s not just because we live under the same roof,” the love coach reminds us. Thus, spending time together becomes a choice, which sends a message to your partner “I choose to spend time with you because I want to.” This is very positive, and the dates are often high quality, since there’s no constraint, “you choose what you share and don’t feel obliged to share everything.”

► Less chance of falling into routine. Watching the same Netflix series every night and eating at the same time doesn’t really exist when you don’t live together. “The habitual daily routines that add nothing to the relationship are no longer part of the equation,” explains Élodie. Thus, the couple decides to come together around activities, dinners, weekends… Of course, it’s possible to develop a routine, but it doesn’t dominate the relationship.

Not Suitable for Everyone

This way of experiencing a romantic relationship isn’t for everyone. Some people need to wake up next to their partner every morning. However, this relationship model doesn’t mean you’ll see your partner less; “some celicouples see each other every day, perhaps sharing all their dinners, but just not living under the same roof.” This style of relationship only works if both partners have similar desires and are on the same wavelength. Non-cohabitation can be challenging for couples with children or those who want them, in which case, other models might be considered, like having separate bedrooms to maintain some individuality.

“It’s important to note: don’t confuse celicouple with a casual relationship,” emphasizes the coach. Not living together doesn’t mean being uncommitted, losing touch, and rarely seeing each other. As Élodie points out, some people confuse the terms, “being in a celicouple is committing; it’s not ‘I see you when I feel like it’ and I’m not invested in the relationship.” Finally, maintaining a celicouple relationship requires a budget that’s not accessible to everyone.

Special thanks to Élodie Cavalier, love coach and founder of And Love Coaching.