Why Do Some People Cheat Even in Happy Relationships? Unveiling the Truth!

They love each other, share a stable daily life, future plans, and sometimes even deep mutual understanding… yet, infidelity occurs, far from the stereotype of a relationship in crisis or on the verge of collapse. So, why cross that line when nothing appears to be lacking? “A happy couple is also a societal perception,” notes Sandra Barba, a psychotherapist, speaking to Women’s Journal. For some cheaters, the act of straying stems primarily from a personal quest: a need to feel desired, to reclaim a sense of freedom, or to reignite aspects of themselves that have been dormant in the relationship routine, as explained by the expert. Certain personalities are therefore more prone to infidelity.

“Some cheat because they feel suffocated in their relationship and can’t figure out how to change their partnership, so they seek that breath of fresh air elsewhere.” For others, it’s primarily about filling a void, the thrill of the forbidden, or “allowing themselves sexual deviations or novelties without emotional attachment.” In any case, if these infidelities occur, “it’s because one is not fully satisfied or happy,” the expert assures. “Sometimes, it doesn’t take much, which is why some prefer to cheat rather than break up,” she adds.

“Cheating Isn’t Necessarily a Deliberate Act”

Behind the act of infidelity, there isn’t always a lack of love, but sometimes more subtle tensions, unspoken needs, or internal contradictions that are hard to reconcile. “Many couples are in the same pattern,” observes Sandra Barba. “One is in denial, convinced that everything is fine, while the other feels unfulfilled or not completely happy according to their needs.” While infidelity can reflect a moment of weakness in the relationship, it isn’t necessarily destined to repeat. “If one has acknowledged what happened and has worked properly on the infidelity by communicating or opting for therapy, then it doesn’t have to become the norm,” reassures Sandra Barba. “Cheating isn’t necessarily a calculated, planned, or obvious act, it can just be a moment where one removes prohibitions.”

If, according to the psychotherapist, “we are fundamentally faithful,” infidelity might surface when one does not feel fully fulfilled, despite appearances. It is, however, possible to build a relationship where each person feels truly satisfied and even remain faithful for life. “One can find a partner who fulfills all our needs and be in a relationship where the other person promotes positive values, a caring perspective, while allowing a space for freedom.” This balance then limits the need to seek elsewhere what seems missing.