Divorce Trends: Expert Reveals Common Traits Among Couples Who Split!

Divorce is a complex, multifaceted issue, often stemming from a blend of causes. Various economic, socio-cultural, and individual factors can influence the likelihood of a couple splitting up. For instance, it’s noted that divorce rates are higher in major cities compared to rural areas. Despite the variability, there are several recurring reasons that typically lead to the dissolution of a marriage.

Starting with communication issues. Those who end up divorcing often suffer from poor or nonexistent communication. Sandrine Carême, a sexologist and couple’s therapist, has noted in her practice an accumulation of frustrations, misunderstandings, and disagreements that eventually tear couples apart. “Both partners struggle to express their needs, feelings, and to discuss their concerns. This can create marital difficulties and pave the way to a breakup,” she explains.

Another less obvious issue at the start is the mismatch in values or shared goals. This underscores the importance of couples understanding their individual and shared values. “As the relationship progresses, it might become apparent that life goals differ substantially. One might want to travel, while the other prefers a more settled, secure lifestyle. Disagreements can also arise over financial management, child-rearing, and career priorities,” illustrates the couple’s therapist.

Infidelity is a third common cause of divorce. This may be because the betrayed partner cannot get past the infidelity, feeling that their spouse has crossed a line by breaking the trust and security at the foundation of their relationship; or because it’s the cheating partner who decides to leave for the other person. Fourthly, a decline in desire within the marriage can strain the connection between partners, which might lead to frustrations and potentially to affairs. “Indeed, while it’s normal for desire to fluctuate, if nothing is done to nurture it, it’s like a fire going out, making it hard to rekindle,” argues the therapist.

Some couples stay together until their children are grown and then divorce. “Many separations occur when children are older and leave home because what held the couple together was the family and the daily family gatherings. Couples then face an intimacy they’re no longer used to,” elaborates Sandrine Carême.

Significant life changes such as moving, career changes, or the birth of a child are other reasons that can lead to divorce. Some people struggle with the transition from a romantic partnership to a parental one. “There are men who leave because they feel underappreciated. Having another child as a band-aid for a troubled relationship can also hasten a breakup,” informs the couple’s therapist.

Finally, health issues, job loss, or family conflicts can lead to a breakup. “When a woman suffers from a severe health issue, it is often observed that the man leaves, whereas when the situation is reversed, women tend to be more supportive,” notes the specialist. All couples experience highs and lows, but knowing that these are shared can provide comfort and help take a step back to act before it’s too late.